I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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