I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she smelled like a LAN party
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
