actually, I'm a sock model
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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