We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
