I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize