He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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