Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Plan B is the new Plan A
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize