I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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