..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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