let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize