The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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