Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
