The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
