So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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