so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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