My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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