ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
