I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
