Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
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