I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize