Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
