I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
