i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.