I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
