Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
