I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
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I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
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I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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