Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
