they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize