so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
