Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
