I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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