I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
