sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize
