Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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