butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?