He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize