do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
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