coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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