Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Terrible idea I love it
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
