I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
