I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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