A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So apparently I’m into choking now
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