this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize