Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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