K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Bring me that man meat
wow bdsm is so cute
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
