Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
