There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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