I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize