I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
