I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
