Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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