omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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